the GERD

Assalamualaikum, and good afternoon...

Hi! my name is umi faseha but my fella freinds called me seha. I was born in 1991 and this year I'm turning 24. (old women ey'). I'd been labelled as a daughter of my father.. (nominated by my siblings, I bet they just got jealous.) I have a very talented hand and intelligent brain in arts (you know...nominating myself with the gifts). A perfect future housewife..I think so? (just kidding) 

and now, I just discover something really disappointing about my life..I think.

I'm not blaming anybody of this fate..but I discovered that I have GERD. what is that..the Gastroesophageal reflux disease..it's bla..bla..bla....click on the name please.

the simple explanation of this thing: it is a disease! something like the below's pic.

My lord, I keep asking people around me, since I refluxe  so bad since I was 15 years old. and it's almost 10 years I possess that disease. I never know cause I asked wrong person, I asked my mom and she never take it serious, I asked my friends, my teacher, and they said, I DON'T KNOW. I feel so stupid because I could find it in the internet, but I just didn't know the words, the keyword. lately I asked my housemate, and she's a nurse. she's the one who told me that I need to cure this serious disease. 

And now, I don't know if it's worsen so bad, I bet it is. the signs is clear. 

The refluxe, the constipation, dehydration, even the skin problem I have. this is very disappointing.  I fight so hard against the illness I have, but know I just know that I fought towards wrong goal. stupid isn't..It's wasting time, money, energy and my emotion..

the point I am writing this, I just feel so bad..as the time pass, I didn't see any bad effect, but later, when I just forgot about this disease, (actually it has become part of me, like a daily activity) then when the impact comes, I didn't know the cause is that thing! too bad.

I am partly blaming my f****y, lack of attention I guess..and partly my stupidity coz I am blind. I can go cure it myself, but I didn't becoz I don't know. I'm sure is the forgotten one. But my action on changing my diet is actually really accurate..haha! gotcha, I cannot eat gluttonous, wheat-ty, sugary food. non of them dude..coz it's hard to digest..(now I know)

I still didn't go see doctor, because it requires money, to do the x ray, and bla..bla..bla... (I sure like to write this way, boring stuff, something educational) ...furthermore, I'm not abandoning my self, indeed...I applied a medical card by prudential..after 4 months I can use it, and when the time comes, I am ready to be hospitalize. some of you might say I'm crazy, yes..don't wait..but the medical card is all I have to support the bill. (you think it's free) .I don't want to ask from other people. sort a independent type of person (booooo!!)